Suffering that Illuminate the Light

After experiencing long pain in the hospital due to the corona virus, Wednesday August 11,  2021 Guruji was allowed to go home by a team of doctors at the Surya Husada Hospital in Nusa Dua Denpasar.  Then continue to take care of myself patiently at the Ashram accompanied by Guruji’s wife, thankfully after the test at the Prodia Singaraja laboratory on Wednesday, August 25, 2021, by the Compassion spiritual family medical team led by dr.  Eka Imbawan (internist at Surya Husada Hospital Nusa Dua Denpasar), and dr.  Yogi Rangga from Amplapura, Guruji’s health is getting much better.  Following are the conclusions of dr.  Eka Imbawan on the results of the latest laboratory test: “In general, the laboratory parameters show that everything is good.  There are no problems at all.”  Besides that, Guruji’s daily life has also become normal. Guruji can walk in a long distances, no longer bothered by coughs, after returning to the Ashram never use oxygen masks anymore.  And most importantly, I started to sleep well, and the food started to taste good.  In order for this long pain to share the light with all friends, here are a series of personal experiences, that hopefully can be a small lantern (in Balinese language called sundih) for friends who are visited by long darkness due to the corona virus.  While always remember, darkness is not here to attack, but it is here to make the Light shines brighter.

Balancing pharmaceutical drugs with nutrition

It has been Guruji’s habit since childhood, every time it comes to the doctor, Guruji almost always behaves like a very obedient child in front of his parents.  Even more now being treated by a medical team in the form of very close students, who have been caring for Guruji’s health for years.  Repeatedly accompanying Guruji to do medical check-ups, until involve to super-sophisticated device called an MRI.  That’s why, almost all of the doctor’s team’s advice is done very carefully by Guruji.  From taking medicine, taking multi vitamins, getting enough rest, doing breathing exercises to improve oxygen sanitation in the body (inhale through the nose, exhale through the mouth which looks like whistling), sleeping on your stomach at least on your side to avoid possible shortness of breath, regular sunbathing to get vitamin D every morning, wearing a mask, everything is done passionately. Guided by the spirit for speedy recovery, so that Guruji can serve the community again.  In the story of the Compassion family medical team, Guruji is even provided with 4 medical test kits.  From measuring body temperature, oximeters that measure the sanitation of oxygen in the blood, blood pressure measuring devices, to a device that can measure blood sugar levels.  Arriving at the Ashram, the first five days everything is done and reported every day.  Since it was stable within the standard for 5 days, the next day was only reported twice a week to the Compassion family medical team.  In short, once you decide to choose a team of doctors, it is very important to be an obedient patient.

While maintaining high respect for the team of doctors and medical science, Guruji has long read that the human body is the most complex machine in this universe.  Even more so now that the corona virus is relatively new, so research in this field has not been long.  So a multi-disciplinary approach is needed to treat this type of body.  Similar to Dr.  Jill Bolte Taylor, an expert on the human brain from Harvard University, who had to have a stroke before her story about the brain got so deep it was amazing, apparently Guruji was chosen to go through the same dark alley.  In order for the story to go deeper, you must experienced it personally.  Arriving at the Ashram, Guruji remembers the old message of one of the old holy books on healing called Ayur Veda: “If the food is wrong, any medicine will not help.  If the food is right, no medicine is needed.” It shared about the importance of nutrition.  In the world of modern healing, Hippocrates had a message hundreds of years ago: “Both disease and health originate in the stomach.”  In the language of some of the great Master’s friends in the West today: “If you heal your microbiome, your microbiome will heal you”.

In other words, it is very important to listen to the body.  Especially the stomach.  Moreover, in our time, many researchers have connected the stomach with the brain, the stomach with the immune system, the stomach with other systems in the body.  In the world of Shamans (the oldest religion on earth), as well as grown-up disciples of Tantra, everyone often hears this message: “The body are actually sharing a message, the question is are you listening?”.  Armed with simple references like these, Guruji then communicates intensely with the body.  Especially the stomach.  One of the important messages from within reads like this: “The one who knows the body best is the body itself”.  The story is not simple because choosing nutrition has almost no definite guidelines.  Ayur Veda tries to classify the human body into 4 groups (doshas).  Some fit, some don’t.  Understandably, the old holy book was born in an era when the vibrations of nature were not completely the same as the vibrations of nature today.  The only recommended guideline is to be sensitive to the signs that come through the body.  Especially the stomach.  That’s why Guruji is very careful about the quantity and quality of bowel movements (defecation), hunger, good taste in the mouth, and all the slightest changes that occur in the stomach in particular.

Armed with visible spiritual eyes, after returning from the hospital more than one person reported that Guruji’s face was like a baby’s.  Smooth, soft, sensitive, as well as getting higher in terms of spiritual vibrations.  Because that’s the picture that appears, Guruji’s daily diet at the Ashram is mostly fruit and vegetables which are suitable for a baby’s stomach.  Just as an example, in Bali babies are often fed Ambon bananas, there is also a Balinese biu tabah who tells about other types of bananas that are suitable for babies’ tummies.  Because Guruji went to school in the West, in the West it often hears messages like this: “An apple a day will take all the doctor away”.  So that the combination of these two types of bananas and apples becomes a breakfast menu, as well as dinner.  Note, the fruit is chewed, not juiced.  Because saliva contains enzymes that lighten not only the burden of digestion, but also help the immune system.  The usual rather large lunch involves enough rice, vegetables, and meat.  The results are very commendable.  If on the first day after coming home from the hospital, the color of Guruji’s bowel movements is a scary dark black, the next day it starts to turn yellow.  The next day, it was not only yellow, the discharge was not too hard, not too runny, and was cylindrical in shape.  At the same time, at certain hours the stomach calls with hunger.  A sign that the microbiome in the body is healthy.  At the same time, body temperature, sanitation of oxygen in the blood, blood pressure, and blood sugar levels show a tendency to almost always be within normal standards.  Hard to deny, perseverance to listen to the body, and intelligent response to the body are the determining factors on the path of healing.  What is meant by simple intelligent response, the body is constantly changing.  Even the same body needs different nutrients at different times.  There is no other choice but to listen to the body sensitively.  Especially the stomach.

No less important than biological nutrition, mental nutrition and spiritual nutrition are also important.  In our time, the most sought after mental nutrition is happiness.  Even the United Nations has ranked the happy countries for a long time.  It should be noted, at the beginner level happiness is very dependent on the praise of outsiders.  Once growing up, let alone glowing, happiness depends more on the sense of contentment and gratitude within.  The kind of happiness that is hard for outsiders to steal.  Another peace, it is more related to one’s perseverance to see all perfect as it is.  Birds in the trees, fish in the water.  When it rains, the chickens stay away from the water, the ducks plunge into the pond.  The two were different, but both were peaceful in their natural places.  This is the mind that “rests”.  Far from conflict and criticism.  As a direct result, the energy that leaks through the mind is much less.  This kind of nutrition is also what Guruji builds on every day.  Especially after coming home from the hospital.  The result, beyond words.  Beyond words.

Telepathic communication with the corona virus

Whenever Guruji has difficulty getting close people to grow, telepathic communication is always carried out.  Especially by imagining the beautiful memories together, the good that has been done, and the lessons that have been given.  As a result, almost everything turned beautiful.  It also makes traveling through the dark nights of the soul much easier.  Because that’s the experience, since Guruji hospitalized, Guruji has often made telepathic communication with the corona virus that has entered the body.  Whether you pray using the Genta (holy bell) or small prayers on other occasions, such as just waking up and going to sleep, before praying for all creatures from the lower realms to the upper realms, always take the time to reflect on the perfect goodness brought by the corona virus to Guruji’s personal journey of soul. The telepathic communication is like this, before continuing to pray for all beings, allow Guruji to reflect on the perfect goodness that the corona virus has given us.

  1. Corona virus has brought the soul closer to God.  Mainly because of the direct experience of meeting the king of all fears called death in the first days of hospital admission.  Where there are a number of bodies of victims of the corona virus passing before our eyes.
  2. Corona virus has opened the door of real experience to God (wholeness).  Where there is birth, there is death.  From where a person takes pleasure, from there he will pay for it with pain.
  3. The corona virus has made many sacred teachings (especially compassion) much more perfect than before.  Especially by seeing with my own eyes, how many humans in hospitals are suffering greatly by the corona virus.  There was born the baby of compassion much stronger and more beautiful than before.
  4. Corona virus has made Guruji much more appreciative of life.  Whenever possible, Guruji has always been used to picking up ants or flies floating in the closet water using a closet cleaner before watering the closet, rescuing flies, butterflies, bees, wasps, etc. in the mirror in front of where Guruji writes, feeding wild birds, etc. But now having been brought so close to death by the coronavirus, the same act carries much deeper spiritual vibrations.
  5. Corona virus has made Guruji’s ikigai (reason for living) quality much better.  Ever since he was young, having been marked many times and over and over again, Guruji was born to share the Light.  Especially through writing.  That’s Guruji’s core ikigai.  After experiencing a near death experience with the corona virus, this type of ikigai is like a tree that is very strong in the heart. It gave birth to a strong promise to continue to improve and perfect himself.

Some of the friends must have asked, where did you learn this type of knowledge.  Sometimes, deep gratitude for a virus that almost kills you.  Initially learned from a great soul named Mahatma Gandhi.  When thousands of followers of Mahatma Gandhi were ready to support demonstrations related to the British government’s salt policy, this simple skinny man without hair even meditated for days.  As soon as he finished his meditation, he went down to lead the demonstration.  When asked why meditation took so long, Gandhiji answered plainly: “There should not be any anger inside.”  The proof, afterwards the strongest army in the world, namely the British army had to leave India.  The second lesson is from Lama Atisha.  A holy man from India who experienced complete enlightenment in Indonesia in the Srivijaya era.  On his way to Indonesia, Lama Atisha was intercepted by a very scary creature in the middle of the ocean.  With complete calm this Buddhist monk met this terrifying creature on the ship’s deck: “Mother, if you are thirsty, my blood is indeed for drinking.  If you are hungry, my flesh and bones are meant to be eaten.”  As soon as he finished muttering like that, this very scary creature even prayed (deeply saluted) at Padma Lama Atisha’s feet.  From there the spirit of telepathic communication with the corona virus was obtained.  Thankfully it bears beautiful fruit, the body becomes healthier faster, the journey of the soul is safe.  In conclusion, it is true that compassion heals. Compassion not only heals, it saves our life.

The healing power of the close family

Dr.  Robert Waldinger of Harvard University, who presented the results of Harvard University’s 75 years of research on 724 closely monitored respondents made a very beautiful conclusion on youtube.  In the end, what makes a healthy human life safe is “the quality of relationships of that person with his close people”.  In the early days of Guruji being hospitalized due to the corona virus at a hospital in Singaraja, the state of the surrounding environment in particular was very touching.  There are many corona virus patients who are helpless, alone without the company of their families, at the same time the bodies of people who died because of the corona virus are milling about giving birth to a lot of fear.  At times like that, Ibu (Guruji’s wife) bravely takes care of Guruji alone.  Ibu comes inside the room where Guruji is being treated.  Day and night.  Even though she had to be yelled at many times by the nurse.  At the same time, there were two doctors (ie dr. Eka Imbawan from Denpasar, and dr. Yogi Rangga from Amlapura) who were very patient in caring for Guruji.  Even though they have to drive their own car at night for more than 2 hours each trip.  Still these two doctors are diligent and sincere in caring for Guruji.  There the conclusion of the expert on genetics, Dr.  Kenneth Pelletier was right: “Good friends are good medicine too”.  Friends are medicine.

Especially when there was a crisis so that Guruji had to be transferred to a hospital in Denpasar, at night in an ambulance to Denpasar Guruji was accompanied by his wife alone, in the back escorted by Mr. Kadek Irawan’s car (his nickname was Kadek Optimist), the head of the Ashram’s household affairs,  around 02 am greeted by dr.  Eka Imbawan in Denpasar.  Can not imagine what would have happened if the support of close family and close friends was not this great.  Again no idea.  When this dark tunnel is passed, there is a sacred message from within: “The sincerity of service to others is a reflection of your sincerity in caring for them for decades”.  The next day, the bright sun of life began to rise.  Compassion’s spiritual family hired a Home Care company that provided nurses 24 hours a day without interruption.  There are three families close to Compassion family who take turns bringing Guruji’s favorite delicious food.  After a short free time, when I opened social media, especially FB, there were a lot of prayers and support from friends.  Again this told me, close friends really have become medicine.  At times like that, a sacred message is often heard from within: “To love and to be loved is the highest form of happiness”.  To love and be loved is the most admirable face of happiness.  From there also flows beautiful medicine from within.  Feeling loved breeds gratitude, gratitude not only gives birth to inner medicine, but also helps to build connection with the higher self.

It is this last sense of connectedness that makes the experience of being treated at the Surya Husada Hospital Nusa Dua Denpasar Bali feels so much lighter.  The meal was starting to feel a little better, although both hands were full of IVs and other wires, the body was starting to fall asleep.  From there the turning point of healing occurred.  Again to be shared here, it was possible because there was great support from close family and close friends.  Especially when allowed to go home from the hospital.  It was like opening the door of heaven on earth.  Along the journey from Denpasar to Singaraja escorted by Pak Koming Sudiarta, escorted by Pak Adi Wirawan and Nyoman Ariana it felt like a true journey back home.  “Back home as a hero”, that is one message from the elders of the Indian tribes in America.  Arriving at the Ashram where Guruji lives, Guruji’s youngest son Ram made a touching video of “Welcome Home” by Guruji’s 5 grandchildren.  Nanda Guruji’s eldest grandson begins the video with a message like this: “Welcome home Grandpa, everyday we love you”.  The young grandson Artha uses beautiful English: “I love you Granpa”.  Prajna’s third grandson hugs very beautifully in the video.  It brought tears to my eyes many times.  This draws to conclusion through direct personal experience: “Home is not a place.  It is a feeling of being unconditionally accepted”.  Home is not a place, but a feeling of being totally accepted, without any pre-conditions.  While in other places people affected by the corona virus are treated far below what they deserve, in Guruji’s close family (biological and spiritual), the treatment is very beautiful.  And it gave birth to an infinite amount of medicine inside.  From deep thankfulness to infinite gratitude.  It is true as Guruji often writes, family is indeed the most beautiful shelter in this era.  Guruji’s blessings are more abundant because Guruji not only have a great biological family like Ibu and Wika, but also have a Compassion spiritual family whose survival power is amazing.  Thankfully, astungkara, Ibu until today on her 59th birthday is still in a very good health, and very cheerful.  And all these expensive expenses, to treat Guruji for almost 3 weeks in the hospital, were all borne by the Compassion family.  Again the voice from within confirmed: “Only he who cares for others carefully, is also cared for carefully by others”.  Hopefully this personal experience is useful for all friends.

Photo taken and edited by Guruji’s youngest Ram (Ram Publications)

Note: Because this article is a continuation of the previous article entitled “Guruji’s spiritual journey recovering from the corona virus”, there is no harm in briefly summarizing the essence of the previous article:

  1. Mind medicine (mind as medicine).  The mind will be poison if one’s thoughts are very negative.  In this case, the darkness of disease from the outside will give birth to a dangerous darkness within.  The mind will be medicine if it is positive-holistic in viewing at life.  Where there is a mountain peak, there is an abyss.  Where there is pleasure, there is pain.  Refreshing the memory of friends, the mind is the result of the dynamic interaction between intelligence, memory and human interaction.  The most important thing is intelligence.  And among all the intelligences, the most recommended is mindfulness.  Which is strengthened through meditation.
  2. God as beauty.  Honestly, it must be revealed to all friends, God is exists and real.  In the midst of this long pain, the face of God who often comes and heals is God as beauty.  In a concrete form, it appears in the form of deep gratitude.  There is a strong urge to write a long list of things to be grateful for.  Another face, from the inside likes to sing.  At least sing inside the heart.  Especially after coming home from the hospital and arriving at the Ashram, all things in the Ashram give birth to gratitude.  That is the face of God that is very saving in this day and age.  That is God as beauty.
  3. The path of deep spirituality seems like a half-battle.  Some holy souls like Shri Ram in Hinduism are really fighting, HH Lama Padmasambawa in Buddha is even burned alive three times.  And in all three times, the fire turned into a cool lotus pond.  And he sat quietly and beautifully on the lotus.  But once it was explored, the real battle took place inside.  Once one accepts the attacking side as a holistic part of the inner self, there all fighting stops.  In Buddhism, that is called enlightenment.

About the author

H.H. Guruji Gede Prama

Gede Prama started his spiritual journey through a dialogue with his symbolic Guru in a village at the north of Bali. The journey is then being enriched with his experiences of studying abroad, his meetings with the world greatest spiritual Gurus: His Holiness Dalai Lama, The Venerable Thich Nhat Hanh, as well as Professor Karen Armstrong; and also being deepened by his intense meditation practices.

Despite the fact that he was once a CEO of a large corporation with thousand of employees, and was traveling abroad frequently for the purpose of teaching, yet, being deeply moved by the Bali bombing incident in 2002, he then decided to leave everything and went back to his home island.
He has never leave Bali for the past few years. In fact, he rarely leaves the silence of the forest where he lives, except for the purpose of teaching at the sacred sites within Bali.

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